Denise Jensen is a free-spirited mother of two with a history of dangerous relationships and a talent for survival. She and her children share a trailer with Buzz, her current boyfriend. He provides her with a roof over her head, occasional childcare, and just enough abuse to remind her of who she is. For Denise, BUMP+ means access to free medical care – and some time to make the best decision for herself and her family.
Do you know someone like Denise? Do you have any advice for her?
15 Responses to “Denise”
In 1973, the U.S. Supreme Court gave women a choice. Thirty-seven years later, we're giving them a voice. BUMP+ is a provocative web series from Yellow Line Studio that follows the fictional stories of three women facing unintended pregnancies.
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Katie, Hailey, and Denise have been through so much—so much heartbreak. Each journey has been difficult and painful. They’ve made their decisions; and in that sense, each journey is at an end. But now they have to figure out how to live with the choices they’ve made.
I worry for Katie and John. I [...]
To Our Audience -
Bump+ The Show has come to an end – but the conversation it has sparked is just beginning.
When we launched this experiment, the only thing we knew for sure was that the time for a new kind of conversation about the sensitive topic of abortion had come. We hoped that story [...]
The creators of Bump+ would like to address several errant media reports. Headlines around the world have said Bump+ trivializes the issue of abortion. Fox News has suggested that Bump+ is an “abortion game show.” It is not. We take the stories of our characters and the choices that lie ahead of [...]
Lauri responds to the question of creating television shows.
To Our Audience -
Bump+ The Show has come to an end – but the conversation it has sparked is just beginning.
As word about Bump+ spread to 64 countries across the globe, controversy and criticism from people on both sides of the debate followed; but instead of listening to them, you found the courage to listen to each other. Six weeks and more than 125,000 site visits later, your responses not only to our characters, but also to each other has proved to the world what we suspected all along – we were right to trust in the goodness and intelligence of our audience. We are intensely humbled by the stories you’ve shared and the respect you have shown to each other. Your partnership has challenged us to see this debate in new ways, and reminded the world that we don’t have to agree to listen and respond with compassion. Thank you for that gift.
Comments on individual episodes have now been closed in order to preserve what was The Bump Experience as it unfolded. A new comment thread has been opened here to keep the conversation going. Please visit this link to share your story and join the conversation.
My name is Roger, and my wife and I are longing for children of our own. There is pain and fear involved in an unwanted pregnancy, but there is also drawn-out sorrow, suffering and exhaustion in a battle with infertility that lasts 3 times as long as any full-term pregnancy. The struggle of the women on this show reminds me of a song my wife listens to:
Jenny was my best friend.
Went away one summer.
Came back with a secret
She just couldn’t keep.
A child inside her,
Was just too much for her
So she cried herself to sleep.
And she made a decision
Some find hard to accept.
To young to know that one day
She might live to regret.
But I would die for that.
Just to have one chance
To hold in my hands
All that she had.
I would die for that.
The pain of infertility, and the option of adoption, are not taught enough to the young people who are facing these tremendous decisions. Shows like “Secret Life of the American Teenager” and movies like “Juno” are helping to raise awareness, but there’s still this misconception that the choice is Raising an Unwanted Child verses Aborting It. Include the option of abortion, and all of the arguments about wanting to have mercy and not bring a child into a bad life are negated – for a nine-month sacrifice, a woman can spare the life of a baby and give it something priceless: a loving family.
Realistically, folks, the writers are probably going to end up showing us 3 different scenarios, and at least one will probably involve abortion. But consider what a practical message of hope they would give by showing 3 different ways to act without killing anything: adoption by agency, adoption by personal acquaintance or family friend, keeping the baby and making the current relationship work, or keeping the baby and leaving the current relationship to protect the baby. In a world where abortion is commonplace, THAT would be revolutionary.
After watching through all of the episodes again, my wife and I think that the producers have left each of the women some positive options that do not include abortion.
Denise will not have a happy ending unless she leaves her abusive relationship, either permanently or until Buzz has made some real, measurable progress in counseling. Terminating a pregnancy would just be adding to the collateral damage from the abuse she takes from Buzz – for her relationship to be so terrible that she is afraid to bring a new baby into it is tragic indeed. Denise needs to value herself enough to remove herself and her children from harm’s way, so that she does not need to fear to give birth to a new baby. I know that some will think “Single Mom, 3 kids, way too difficult!”, but that statement does a disservice to the single moms we know who are making it work, with help from the church, family, and social services. Denise needs a new support network to make her feel loved and capable, and help prevent her from making a life-ending decision – abortion – out of fear. No decision should be made out of fear.
The question is, will the producers choose to show us the truly hope-inspiring and empowering endings for these women? I guess we’ll find out in March.
My name is Nicole I am 23 years old and I regret my abortion.
At the time of my abortion I was 22. I was in a verbally abusive and what soon turned into a physically abusive relationship with my then boyfriend. I had gotten pregnant. I was scared and I didn’t know where to go or what to do. Like you, I too thought I was alone.
My boyfriend suggested I get an abortion because he wasn’t ready. I love kids and have always dreamed of having them. How could I raise a child on my own? There should be two parents. I cried alone that night in my bed, too afraid to tell my parents, my family, not even my best friend. I was ashamed that I had gotten pregnant outside of marriage and felt that I would be an embarrassment to my family. I called the clinic (Planned Parenthood) and made all the arrangements. I thought this was the easy way out. After all, who would find out? I took the RU-486 pill. I was unaware at the time that I was blessed and protected by God because I later learned of all the complications and deaths from the pill…
It was a beautiful sunny day, not a cloud in the sky as I drove myself and my boyfriend to the clinic in May of 2008; a day I will never forget. Two DAYS BEFORE MOTHER’S DAY, I took that the first pill and one day before, I had aborted my child. I started cramping and I ran to the toilet. All I remember is holding the tissue paper drenched with blood dripping all over my hands and looking at the tissue paper at what appeared to be a “BLOB” as the PLANNED PARENTHOOD employees so nicely put it. That “BLOB” turned out to be my baby. I took the tissue paper with the eight-week-old fetus and threw it in the toilet and flushed it. It wasn’t until a couple days later that I realized what I had done. I had just held my eight-week-old baby and then flushed it down the toilet like a dead goldfish.
I became numb, distant, depressed. I had recently started a new job and had no friends for the first 8-10 months of working there. I pushed everyone away. I thought I was alone. I didn’t know where to turn.
You see, Planned Parenthood made me feel like what I was going through was “not normal. “ They said it was a blob and that it was not anything, that I was “DOING THE RIGHT THING.” But it was something, it was not an it, it was my baby who was developed, who had hands, feet, and a heartbeat.
My depression got so bad I wanted to die. I believed all the lies I was fed. I ignored God. Keeping silent almost killed me. I had came up with a plan to end my life. I was so scared I’d kill myself. I felt I became a danger to myself and others because at any moment I knew I could snap. I wanted to stop the pain. I wanted to stop the suffering the self torment the hatred I had for myself. “How could I kill my child? I was a murderer. God will never forgive you. Your family will hate you.” The words seemed to be whispered in my ears over and over like a broken record. The images flashed before me like a never-ending horror movie. I felt like Bill Murray in “Groundhog Day.” I seemed to relive that day over and over again. I didn’t’ know how else to end it all but to die. I blamed God. I hated God. I asked HIM everyday… “WHY DIDNT YOU STOP ME? WHY DIDNT YOU GIVE ME A WAY OUT? WHY DID YOU LET THIS HAPPEN?”…HE replied “I DID TRY BUT YOU CHOSE TO IGNORE ME.”
You see, three years prior God knew what was going to happen. One day at work, I saw a flyer for a Christian Pregnancy Crisis Help Center; at the time I didn’t know why but I picked it up and brought it home and hung it on the fridge. Little did I know what the flyer truly meant to me and my life. Before I had the abortion, I saw the flyer on the fridge and God was right–HE gave me a way out and I IGNORED HIM! I looked at the flyer, there on the fridge, the day I found out I was pregnant. Instead of calling them I made my call to Planned Parenthood.
A couple months later, I remember grabbing the flyer off the fridge, yelling at God and getting into my car. I was headed to work but didn’t plan on making it that far. I started to cry uncontrollably. I wanted to die I thought today is the day to end the pain. But God had other plans for my life… Something made me pull over–that something was GOD. I started crying out to God for forgiveness for mercy for help I looked over and the flyer was on the passenger seat. I picked it up and called the number. To my surprise they offered after-abortion counseling. That call saved my life. God never left my side; He was there with me watching over me protecting me. I owe Him my life. I started the counseling and went through a couple-month program. I received Healing and learned God loves me and has a purpose for my life as HE does for yours….I have never been happier now that I have God. It’s a satisfaction, a fulfillment that can only be done though HIM. I am truly blessed and can now continue on with my life.
You see. You’re not alone. Don’t believe the lies the media and the clinics try to portray. It is NORMAL to feel the way you do. Abortion is a trauma, it is a death. It is normal to go through the stages of grief. Just remember you are not alone and you can be forgiven. There is hope. Our God is a merciful God. Slow to anger, He loves each and everyone of us and wants you to turn to HIM. He can help you.
GOD CAN END THE SUFFERING. HE CAN TAKE AWAY THE PAIN.
“Know therefore that the LORD your God is God; he is the faithful God, keeping his covenant of love to a thousand generations of those who love him and keep his commands. – (Deuteronomy 7:9)
The Bible says, “If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.” (1 John 1:9)
“Repent therefore and be converted, that your sins may be blotted out, so that times of refreshing may come from the presence of the Lord.” (Acts 3:19)
I am so much like her it is scarey and yes i was betten when i was yonger so i know what it is like and some times i do see it after i say something or so somethig and i feel like a idit but tghats just me i guess.
As a Mother of two I know life is never what we dream it to be when we are little girls. Sometimes we are up and sometimes we are down. I view my children as blessings. They are now adults and both are great people and they make me proud. I understand your situation been there done that. I also understand what its like to live with a very mentally sick person. But I would never choose to take my babies life because of who or what the father is. I am a strong woman. I would live and make my life what I want. If you can choose abortion then you can chose to change your life if you cant stand the father or if he is abusivethen leave. There are tons of agencys that will help you have this baby take care of your kids and make a new start in your life. I am praying you choose life.
Just on mothers opinion to another
peace and love can be yours
Denise,
Keeping this child is the best decision. How much joy have you found from your 2 children already? More joy than I imagine you receive from Buzz. I’m sorry that you are in an abusive relationship. There is always a way out. Go to local pregnancy centers or check out community centers (YMCA, Food Co-ops, etc.) and they will have lists of counselors or people that you can get in contact with to help you and your kids to find a safe place to live without Buzz.
Making the decision to leave relationships is (sometimes sadly) not permanent; however the decision to get an abortion is. You will never be able to take back what you do, whether it is get an abortion or have the child. My own mother had 10 kids and 2 miscarriages, 2 of the kids were twins (I’m one of the twins). Some people may balk at the number and say, “Well there obviously wasn’t enough love going around in that family” but I tell you this: I felt more love than any human will ever give me. My family (INCLUDING my parents) loved each other and we have always been there for each other, and I have found no greater love from another human being. If my mother had chosen to get an abortion after her 2nd one, I wouldn’t be here, and honestly, I’m glad I was given the chance to live. Aren’t you? Share that with the child you hold in your womb. Share that with the kids you have right now. SHARE IT! Don’t take it away, please! I beg you!
And as for Buzz, this is a situation you CAN leave. There is never a person on this earth who has no one to love them. They choose to be lonely, to not accept help or love from another person. There are so many people who would love to care for you and would be there for you! You just have to look, and sometimes, they are right under your very nose. But when you receive that help, please don’t forget to share it with others. Some of the advice others have given you is selfish, to not bring a child in because you are “immature” or “just not ready”. That is beyond selfish. Who is ever truly ready to raise a child? You never know how to raise a child until you have one, and even then you learn as you go! You’ve had 2, and I do think you are ready to have more. So many mothers I know act just like you, which is pretty normal (picking specific candy out of a dish at the bank, talking just like your kids, the list goes on…)
Please, Denise, keep your child. The gift of life is the most precious of gifts. Sadly, we live in a world where it’s not.
You are loved and in my prayers,
Cathie
denise don’t do it. Don’t have this child, you will be bringing it into an abusive relationship where the infant will never be able to fend for itself. Grow up a little, get out of the relationship, get help from organizations, take your kids with you and don’t make them suffer thruogh your mistake of a relationship. Show them you care about them first by leaving abuse and not having another child that iwll only take away from what you could be giving them!!
Leave your boyfriend!!!! Get to a woman’s shelter and they will help you.
As for the pregnancy. Denise knows better than any of the others what’s involved in carrying a baby to term and raising kids, so she doesn’t need any more advice. Maybe she could use her expertise to councel the others. I’m surprised they’re not all hitting her up for info.
Abstinence is unrealistic, Maria A. We have plenty of people on the planet to attest to that and not everyone has the same religious objections to sex.
Lisa – Abstinence is not unrealistic and not attached to religion. Its a good healthy choice for high school young women.
[THIS COMMENT HAS BEEN EDITED]
I agree. Teens have the body drive for sex unlike any other time in life, even a woman’s 30s testosterone+. No teen should be bligated to miss out on that. If they want to, fine, but the teen years is one of the best sexually charged years of one’s life, and it’s not fair to expect EVERYONE to just ignore their instincts. Hopefully they use protection and don’t get into a bad relationship. Abstinence is realistic… for some people. Personally, I know it wasn’t for me. I would have suffered if I had repressed my horniness, haha. Luckily, when I was a teen, it was only with another woman, but I know for a fact that some of my closest friends were sexually active… and others yet wanted to wait till they finished college. Most of them didn’t actually wait until they finished college, as I’m sure you already guessed, and about half of them had abortions. A few of them quit college and became mothers, the rest simply didn’t get pregnant either because they were lucky (or so they said) or because they were on the pill.
And yeah, most of them were christian women. I’m not, but I have been to church and I fully support these women. They love Jesus and pray when they feel they need heaven’s grace. Religious people can get abortions, too. They can also have premarital sex. There is no law stating that someone has to follow their religion’s guidlines (or laws, whatever) to a T. Most people just don’t because, hey we’re human, and we can not all be perfect all of the time. You’ve read The Crucible, right? See how striving for a society that never made mistakes turned out for those people.
PS
I was saying that I agree with Lisa, that abstinence is not realistic for EVERYONE, not even most people. I do however think that it is a viable option for those that think they can handle it and are honestly striving hard for something that will make them successful and can afford to ignore their animal impulses.
Denise, I wish I could sit with you and hold your hands, tell you that you are a beautiful young woman and you have a life of value and purpose in this world. I wish I could erase the hurt which you have experienced at such a young age and tell you that everything would be okay. But I can’t. With adult act comes adult responsibility.
You are stronger than you think and already have a displayed respect for human life by keeping your first two children. But your needs are not being met and your looking for love in all the wrong places…especially with BUZZ…just the name creeps me out.
I would seek counsel at a pregnancy crisis center and give your baby up for adoption. There are so many places available to get free counseling and group support for you and your children.
Best advice: Always start at the beginning… with an A for ABSTINENCE. Birth control is not working for you…having sex is not worth it for you. Get responsible, love your kids, and seek support and stick to it. You can do it.
Denise reminds me of someone I once knew. Although she was no longer a teenager — even for a number of years, she often acted and spoke like a little girl (I could so see her doing the ‘red candy’ thing, and she often said things she knew would shock the listener). She had a boyfriend that she adored, but he treated her like dirt. We tried to convince her to leave him, but she couldn’t see any reason for taking such drastic action. He was magic ‘once a week’ and he would help her take care of the twins and their little girl. It was so hard to watch them all go through all this, but I know that if she had aborted any of them she would have been haunted by it for the rest of her life. The children were eventually adopted by another family member due to S. experiencing a terrible accident, so I do not know what they are doing today.