Pilot: Episode 1

271 Responses to “Pilot: Episode 1”

  1. admin says:

    To Our Audience -

    Bump+ The Show has come to an end – but the conversation it has sparked is just beginning.

    As word about Bump+ spread to 64 countries across the globe, controversy and criticism from people on both sides of the debate followed; but instead of listening to them, you found the courage to listen to each other. Six weeks and more than 125,000 site visits later, your responses not only to our characters, but also to each other has proved to the world what we suspected all along – we were right to trust in the goodness and intelligence of our audience. We are intensely humbled by the stories you’ve shared and the respect you have shown to each other. Your partnership has challenged us to see this debate in new ways, and reminded the world that we don’t have to agree to listen and respond with compassion. Thank you for that gift.

    Comments on individual episodes have now been closed in order to preserve what was The Bump Experience as it unfolded. A new comment thread has been opened here to keep the conversation going. Please visit this link to share your story and join the conversation.

  2. Roger says:

    My name is Roger, and my wife and I are longing for children of our own. There is pain and fear involved in an unwanted pregnancy, but there is also drawn-out sorrow, suffering and exhaustion in a battle with infertility that lasts 3 times as long as any full-term pregnancy. The struggle of the women on this show reminds me of a song my wife listens to:

    Jenny was my best friend.
    Went away one summer.
    Came back with a secret
    She just couldn’t keep.
    A child inside her,
    Was just too much for her
    So she cried herself to sleep.

    And she made a decision
    Some find hard to accept.
    To young to know that one day
    She might live to regret.

    But I would die for that.
    Just to have one chance
    To hold in my hands
    All that she had.
    I would die for that.

    The pain of infertility, and the option of adoption, are not taught enough to the young people who are facing these tremendous decisions. Shows like “Secret Life of the American Teenager” and movies like “Juno” are helping to raise awareness, but there’s still this misconception that the choice is Raising an Unwanted Child verses Aborting It. Include the option of abortion, and all of the arguments about wanting to have mercy and not bring a child into a bad life are negated – for a nine-month sacrifice, a woman can spare the life of a baby and give it something priceless: a loving family.

    Realistically, folks, the writers are probably going to end up showing us 3 different scenarios, and at least one will probably involve abortion. But consider what a practical message of hope they would give by showing 3 different ways to act without killing anything: adoption by agency, adoption by personal acquaintance or family friend, keeping the baby and making the current relationship work, or keeping the baby and leaving the current relationship to protect the baby. In a world where abortion is commonplace, THAT would be revolutionary.

    • Carpe Diem says:

      I agree Roger that would be revolutionary to show for instance, the positive side of open-adoption as a viable choice.

      I first want to thank you for sharing your story and bringing awareness to the pain of infertility. Unless you have experienced it firsthand, its very difficult to explain. Having lived through first 7 years, longing for a child and then another 9 after that longing for a sibling for our one and only, not to mention adding insult to injury by having 4 miscarriages and two ectopic pregnancies along the way. I can assure you that I have cried a river of tears and have run the gamut of emotional reactions to hearing the news of someone else’s pregnancy. Especially hurtful to me was hearing of a “unwanted” pregnancy.

      I have always said I want to write a book about my journey, to hopefully help others who may be just beginning on this lonesome and frightening path. In fact, the title would be “What I Wouldn’t Give for Fingerprints on My Windows”. That title taken from an experience I had just after loosing #3, when a frazzled and unthinking friend of mine who was exhausted under the responsibility and blessing of 4 kids under 6 years of age yelled out how sick to death she was of cleaning sticky fingerprints. She had just cleaned her windows and one of her sweet little ones had just discovered how fun it was to play finger-paint with her peanut-butter and jelly sandwich. We laugh about it now, but at the time, it was all I could do just to try to swallow the lump in my throat, and leave as fast as possible to wallow in my self-pity.

      By the way, I by no means want to belittle those very natural and necessary reactions we all must go through in order to progress on this journey. I just honestly want to tell you that there was a time when just reading those words in that song would take me to a place of such frustration, and despair and disappointment and anger and rage all at once.

      We all have a choice when life takes us on a path we didn’t want to go down. We can get bitter or better. We can choose to think of ourselves or of others. We can be a blessing or a curse. Life is so much about our perspective. We can choose to see the positive in the situation or the negative. These good decisions unfortunately don’t come naturally and we live in a society that tells us to follow our heart, rather than teaching us to choose to lead it. The heart is more deceitful than anything, and it will pursue what feels right at the moment. We, as a society, need to choose to lead our hearts toward what is best in the long run.

      It took me a long time to open my heart up to adoption because fear of the unknown held me back. It sounds like you are already well on your way. I would like to encourage you to pursue it wholeheartedly. I wish I would have done it long ago.

      Adoption is one of the rare opportunities where we get to experience close up and personal what it looks like when unconditional love invades the heart of the birth-parent(s) and she/they are empowered to endure deeper pain, willingly pay a greater cost, and run the risk of losing their reputation for the sake of another. I have no greater respect for anyone else on this planet than these courageous birthparents! Now after experiencing the blessing that can come to all of the parties involved in an open-adoption, I want to do my part to help educate people of the beautiful opportunity that exists to make what once may have been a crisis turn into the best gift you could ever give to someone.

      I’m so sorry that you and your wife have had to endure this long and very painful experience, but I am hopeful that you will find even more than a beautiful child for the two of you to hold and love.
      In the end, I hope you get to see this kind of love.

    • Truth says:

      Right on, Roger!

  3. Sarah Northwood says:

    I noticed that “Hailey” says that she cries about everything. That she’s very sensitive. One of the main things I noticed about my post-abortive self was that as I denied the pain that was in my heart because of what I had done to my baby, I also began becoming more and more numb across the board. It took years of healing to come out of the emotional “deep freeze”

  4. Steve says:

    Each of these situations are especially difficult when one looks at the feelings involved. However, the stories end, I am not focused on pointing an accusing finger. Rather I would point to relationships. I would point to how to maintain and deepen relationships. They say, “It takes two to tango.” When that happens, one should not be surprised if a third is on the way. In this fashion relationships multiply. In my mind, the question is: Should we value the feelings or should we value the relationships as a society?

    I know what it is like to value my feelings in my actions.

    I know what it is like to value my relationships in my actions.

    At the end of the day I find I like how I feel when I value my relationships in my actions.

    The interesting thing is that feelings change from day to day; this can result in ignoring the wellbeing of others should it be taken to an extreme. If, on the other hand, we are encouraged to commit to relationships we stand a chance of developing habits that support society.

    It strikes me that the real choices are made based on maintaining and deepening relationships because the choices based on feelings change from time to time.

    I developed a relationship with my son before he was born by singing to him. After he was born, he would have difficulty sleeping, but he would sleep when I sang to him. In fact when I deployed in the Navy, I recorded songs for him which helped him to sleep while I was away. Relationships start early even if one is a Dad.

  5. Erin says:

    To the lady pregnant by another man while her husband is in Iraq.I cheated on my husband and got pregnant by another man.The man who I got pregnant by never spoke to me again after I told him I was pregnant. I have been in your situation. It is not easy. I felt like I had no one to turn to. I felt like I deserved to have to abort my child as punishment for what I had done to my child. I felt I didn’t deserve to hold this precious God given gift because of my actions. Unfortunately, I chose to abort my child. I had a surgical abortion, I will regret it until the day I die. I think about my baby almost daily. It has only been 2 years since my abortion, I do not judge any of these women, but I want them to know the reality and the horror and pain that you carry after an abortion. I am a nurse and I have been in the OR and such many times. NOTHING is as horrific as this procedure. I can’t even begin to describe any of it to you. [EDITED TO REMOVE WEBSITE LINK]

  6. nicole says:

    My name is Nicole I am 23 years old and I regret my abortion.

    At the time of my abortion I was 22. I was in a verbally abusive and what soon turned into a physically abusive relationship with my then boyfriend. I had gotten pregnant. I was scared and I didn’t know where to go or what to do. Like you, I too thought I was alone.

    My boyfriend suggested I get an abortion because he wasn’t ready. I love kids and have always dreamed of having them. How could I raise a child on my own? There should be two parents. I cried alone that night in my bed, too afraid to tell my parents, my family, not even my best friend. I was ashamed that I had gotten pregnant outside of marriage and felt that I would be an embarrassment to my family. I called the clinic (Planned Parenthood) and made all the arrangements. I thought this was the easy way out. After all, who would find out? I took the RU-486 pill. I was unaware at the time that I was blessed and protected by God because I later learned of all the complications and deaths from the pill…

    It was a beautiful sunny day, not a cloud in the sky as I drove myself and my boyfriend to the clinic in May of 2008; a day I will never forget. Two DAYS BEFORE MOTHER’S DAY, I took that the first pill and one day before, I had aborted my child. I started cramping and I ran to the toilet. All I remember is holding the tissue paper drenched with blood dripping all over my hands and looking at the tissue paper at what appeared to be a “BLOB” as the PLANNED PARENTHOOD employees so nicely put it. That “BLOB” turned out to be my baby. I took the tissue paper with the eight-week-old fetus and threw it in the toilet and flushed it. It wasn’t until a couple days later that I realized what I had done. I had just held my eight-week-old baby and then flushed it down the toilet like a dead goldfish.

    I became numb, distant, depressed. I had recently started a new job and had no friends for the first 8-10 months of working there. I pushed everyone away. I thought I was alone. I didn’t know where to turn.

    You see, Planned Parenthood made me feel like what I was going through was “not normal. “ They said it was a blob and that it was not anything, that I was “DOING THE RIGHT THING.” But it was something, it was not an it, it was my baby who was developed, who had hands, feet, and a heartbeat.

    My depression got so bad I wanted to die. I believed all the lies I was fed. I ignored God. Keeping silent almost killed me. I had came up with a plan to end my life. I was so scared I’d kill myself. I felt I became a danger to myself and others because at any moment I knew I could snap. I wanted to stop the pain. I wanted to stop the suffering the self torment the hatred I had for myself. “How could I kill my child? I was a murderer. God will never forgive you. Your family will hate you.” The words seemed to be whispered in my ears over and over like a broken record. The images flashed before me like a never-ending horror movie. I felt like Bill Murray in “Groundhog Day.” I seemed to relive that day over and over again. I didn’t’ know how else to end it all but to die. I blamed God. I hated God. I asked HIM everyday… “WHY DIDNT YOU STOP ME? WHY DIDNT YOU GIVE ME A WAY OUT? WHY DID YOU LET THIS HAPPEN?”…HE replied “I DID TRY BUT YOU CHOSE TO IGNORE ME.”

    You see, three years prior God knew what was going to happen. One day at work, I saw a flyer for a Christian Pregnancy Crisis Help Center; at the time I didn’t know why but I picked it up and brought it home and hung it on the fridge. Little did I know what the flyer truly meant to me and my life. Before I had the abortion, I saw the flyer on the fridge and God was right–HE gave me a way out and I IGNORED HIM! I looked at the flyer, there on the fridge, the day I found out I was pregnant. Instead of calling them I made my call to Planned Parenthood.

    A couple months later, I remember grabbing the flyer off the fridge, yelling at God and getting into my car. I was headed to work but didn’t plan on making it that far. I started to cry uncontrollably. I wanted to die I thought today is the day to end the pain. But God had other plans for my life… Something made me pull over–that something was GOD. I started crying out to God for forgiveness for mercy for help I looked over and the flyer was on the passenger seat. I picked it up and called the number. To my surprise they offered after-abortion counseling. That call saved my life. God never left my side; He was there with me watching over me protecting me. I owe Him my life. I started the counseling and went through a couple-month program. I received Healing and learned God loves me and has a purpose for my life as HE does for yours….I have never been happier now that I have God. It’s a satisfaction, a fulfillment that can only be done though HIM. I am truly blessed and can now continue on with my life.

    You see. You’re not alone. Don’t believe the lies the media and the clinics try to portray. It is NORMAL to feel the way you do. Abortion is a trauma, it is a death. It is normal to go through the stages of grief. Just remember you are not alone and you can be forgiven. There is hope. Our God is a merciful God. Slow to anger, He loves each and everyone of us and wants you to turn to HIM. He can help you.

    GOD CAN END THE SUFFERING. HE CAN TAKE AWAY THE PAIN.

    “Know therefore that the LORD your God is God; he is the faithful God, keeping his covenant of love to a thousand generations of those who love him and keep his commands. – (Deuteronomy 7:9)

    The Bible says, “If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.” (1 John 1:9)

    “Repent therefore and be converted, that your sins may be blotted out, so that times of refreshing may come from the presence of the Lord.” (Acts 3:19)

    • Rachel says:

      Thank you so much for sharing your story. God is great! You are forgiven! He is the Prince of Peace and your story is an inspiration. God Bless!

      • klo says:

        only a question…
        will god help you raising a child properly, every single day of his life???
        feeding him or her?
        i truly do not believe it.

        • Rae Stabosz says:

          @klo – There is a line in one of the psalms that says, “No-one who trusts in God will ever be put to shame.” I found myself, like Nicole, on the brink of suicide 36 years ago, when I first reached out in prayer to the God of my childhood, Whom I had thought just an illusion and had abandoned as an adult.

          I told God that I would not kill myself, I would act “as if” He existed, I would try to shape my life and face my problems in the way that I would do if God truly existed, cared about me, and had the power to help me face what seemed a problem with no good solution. I would not give Him a timetable, not ask Him to reveal Self to me right away, but in God’s own time to reveal Himself to me and let me proceed from “as if” to knowledge and faith.

          From that day to this, I can truly say that God has helped me, every single day of my life, in matters both big and small. I trusted in the dark, day by day, and acted “as if” my life was in the hands of a loving Creator. Without knowledge and assurance of His reality, I was fed and began to take the journey away from the abyss of nothingness and self-inflicted death.

          A year after I made that prayer, I had a powerful experience, like St. Paul on the road to Damascus. Out of the whirlwind of my circumstances, through the power of a single phone call, I became convinced beyond the shadow of a doubt that God existed, and that Jesus Christ was alive and introducing himself to me, the same Christ I knew as a child and abandoned, a living redeemer and incarnation of the intimate love of God for His creation.

          So yes, God will help you raise and feed a child, properly, every single day of his life. I truly do believe it. God will help you with this and with every circumstance of your life. Nobody who trusts in God will ever be put to shame. God can be trusted.

        • Dear Rae, thank you for sharing your story. Faith is such a beautiful gift. I have known times of darkness too. Like you, I decided to act “as if” God was there and cared about me. He was, and He did.

  7. Susan says:

    This show seems to focus on the women’s circumstances. What about the life of the baby in the womb? My question is, if you decide to have one of these women abort on your show, will you show the audience an actual abortion? I would be interested more in people’s opinions after they see the real procedure. No matter the circumstances, the procedure is horrific. Once a person watches one, I would wonder then what they think. [THIS COMMENT HAS BEEN EDITED]

    • Kate says:

      Circumstances don’t matter? How? Don’t you think, that women who had 13th child will be so responsible to have another? And what with people who don’t have enough money, strength, time… Are you realy sure, that this baby would have better if would be alive? The world can be cruel. Even adoption sometimes is not the best option, there are so many alone unhappy children in orphanages. Nowadays most infertile marriages would rather have in vitro than adopt alone child.
      You are saying that the procedure is horrific. Have you ever seen other operations? Other procedures? I am a medicine student and I had. Believe me that all of them are horrific.
      To sum up, I don’t want to support abortion, only what I mean is NOT to judge those women. And I don’t wish anybody to be in their shoes.

  8. Charles Colozzi says:

    [THIS COMMENT HAS BEEN EDITED] There is always another alternative, like adoption for example.

  9. Ella says:

    I really like this. I have an open mind about abortion because I believe that it’s your choice and if you can’t raise a baby then you shouldn’t bring it into this world where it may suffer from abuse, lack of food and nutrition. When the time’s right you will have a baby but if the times wrong it is unfair to bring a baby into a world where it wouldn’t have a fulfilling and happy life.

    • Maria says:

      The incidence of child abuse has increased in the United States since the legalization of abortion. If the mother isn’t ready to parent, she can place the child for adoption, which is the true loving choice.

  10. gean says:

    For real??? None of these girls should be having a child! None of them are grown ups themselves! Did I really hear that one of them got pregnant while her husband was in Iraq?? Ugh, that’s just someone I don’t raising a future leader. In addition, the girl who apprently already has kids and is obviously in an abusive relationship.. really ladies you want her to actually have a child and bring it into that? Clearly she’s not the adoptive type or she would have let her other 2 kids go. She can’t even take care of her starbursting self!! Oh and the couple, reminds me of another famous blond who didn’t realize that chicken of the sea was tuna… Please, let your religious morals step aside and don’t let these women become parents. this is just sad. Oh and BTW I have had an abortion before and I don’t regret it one bit, I did the right thing. I would have totally screwed that kids life up at that time in my life. The option to not have a child if you become pregnant is there for a reason. Leave your religious beliefs out of the decision that will be for a lifetime for the child. Think of how sucky their life would be with these chicks.

    • Mini says:

      I guess that’s true for some people but only if you view sex for solely procreation purposes.
      I think the women need help first but since we’ve only seen like 12 minutes of them I’ll wait to hear more of their stories, get to know them if you will, and then add my two cents :)

    • Snowy says:

      I agree! None of these women should be having a child. And while their at it….get sterilized so it doesn’t happen again.

    • Petre says:

      Please note that the characters are not actually real. I think they have been chosen to create an opinion that abortion is the “only” option (no matter how the producers actually justify the character selection).

    • Kris says:

      Adoption anyone? Why is abortion the only answer? I know extended family who have raised a teenage relatives’ child. There are other options for each of these situations.

    • Deborah says:

      You don’t have to be grown up to have a child. Children have children all the time. Some choose to adopt out, others to raise the child. Not everyone born is a “leader”, too many chiefs does not make the world go round. People are born ino different status situations and this doesn’t mean their life is less valuable. Abort because of abuse? Rediculous. The loving option for yourseld and the baby is to get out of the situation and raise the child or adopt it out. Setting religion aside…if you have ever studied the development of life or seen any displays you would realize “It’s a baby”, a human life that is being ended my abortion. BTW, I had an abortion and I TOTALLY regret it. I wonder all the time how much better my life would be today if I hadn’t taken that child’s life away. Take it from me, don’t punish the child for your mistakes. Those who say they don’t regret having an abortion are burying their emotions. One day it will catch up to them. If you do get pregnant, don’t punish the child for your mistake.

    • Brandy says:

      I had an abortion when I was 17 and it was the best decision I have EVER made. I have not regretted it for one second. The fact of the matter is that EVERYONE lives under different circumstances and no one has the right to condemn another for anything they do. The “good Christians” that protest outside of the abortion clinics have no effect whatsoever and should stop wasting their time. They need to ask themselves if God would like them placing such judgement on others and being flat out mean to them. I wouldn’t think so.

  11. Mariana says:

    I would imagine this is the kind of response the producers of the show are relishing because it means they have gotten their message accross and people are paying attention. However, you should be ashamed of yourselves for even entertaining the thought of such a show. This is not something to be taken lightly and through this, you will encourage people to entertain getting abortions. If people do not want unplanned pregnancy, stop having sex, use protection or face the consequences. As someone who is sexually active, I am aware that sex is not only for recreation, but procreation and that it comes with consequences. People should be better educated on prevention and protection instead of giving them a way out once the “mistake” has been made. If it really is a mistake then why not adoption? There are millions of people that would die for the chance to have a baby and can’t, and you are entertaining the idea of throwing these lives away because someone had an accident or it is inconvenient for the couple. Life is not about convenience and it is sad to see that people choose to promote such a selfish, ungrateful lifestyle when people every day are struggling with the inability to conceive, and wish that they could have such an “inconveinience” for only a moment. Abortion weighs heavily on the psyches of the people who commit it, and this show is completely insensitive to such a situation, no matter how “thoughtful” it appears to be. This social experiment is completely unwarranted and irresponsible.

    • Lisa says:

      Mariana– Face the facts, people are entertaining the idea of abortion every day. This show will not change that. What this show can, IS accomplishing and creating an open forum for people to discuss it in a kind and personal manner.
      You’re right, people should be more educated about procreation and it should be looked at from a preventative perspective.
      I believe you are wrong however, by saying this show is insensitive. Keep in mind you’ve “known” these characters for all of 15 minutes. I don’t think anyone would like to be judged so quickly so an open mind is best.

  12. lauri says:

    A NOTE FROM THE PRODUCERS -

    It’s been an interesting 24 hours here at Yellow Line Studio. The conversation has garnered some media attention; and practically speaking, that means increased traffic to the web site and on the comment boards. We’ve also noticed that the tone of some of the posts has become more argumentative. We are working to remove or edit the comments that don’t conform to our posted guidelines – and we appreciate your patience.

    To those of you on both sides of the issue who have been so incredibly supportive of this experiment – and especially those who have been brave enough to share your personal stories – we thank you. We know this conversation is not an easy one to have, and that emotions and disagreement will be involved on both sides from time to time. We are trying to let it unfold as naturally as possible, and you have proved to us that we were right to believe in the goodness and intelligence of our audience. Please help us by continuing to reach out to each other with compassion – and gently moderating the conversation yourselves by reminding people to stay on topic and be kind. If posts appear that clearly don’t support the goals of the experiment, rest assured that we are still monitoring the boards and will remove them as soon as humanly possible.

    To those of you who persist in personal attacks or in restating old arguments – we understand that this experiment represents a huge shift in the way we talk about this issue. People from both perspectives are represented on our own creative team, and many of us have had to make the same shift. We have learned that we don’t have to deny or change our personal convictions to listen with compassion – and we want to offer that confidence to you. But we take this issue and our respect for our audience very seriously – and we WILL remove posts that don’t respect our clearly stated guidelines or attempt to derail the conversation.

    Thank you for your patience and understanding.

  13. Celia says:

    They all seem so immature, minus Katie who obviously made a huge mistake. She should talk to her husband. If he wants to still be with her could change a lot.

  14. Jennifer says:

    Nobody is going to kill a baby.

  15. Kayla says:

    A teacher in my catholic school is one of the many many people who stand outside abortion clinic’s and call all of the girls,woman and even men with their partners that walk into that clinic baby killers, inhuman, wrong, immoral, cruel, and many other hateful words. Police are there continulessly because they occationally throw rocks and other items at the patients and employees as they enter the clinic. And in my opinion it is unexceptable and cruel for them as cristian’s and people of faith to say such awful things other human beings. It is terrible the things they say. if being cristian means hating,bashing and picking on other people for their decisions and way of life than I never want to be a part of any of it.

    • Lauren says:

      Kayla,
      I’m eighteen years old, and I’m sexually active. I am pro-life. I am one of “those Christians” who has stood many times outside of abortion mills silenting protesting. I’m sorry that this one specific group of people calling themselves pro-life has hindered our message. I do not think (and the majority of pro-lifers would agree) that what they do is right. We are NOT supposed to be hateful, we are NOT supposed to be critical. We are loving, and we only have the women’s best interest at heart when we stand siliently (except for the sidewalk councelors who are well-trained) outside those mills. The polics should be there and that kind of behavior should NOT be allowed! But keep in mind, that is not just pro-lifers who do that. I’ve been assaulted by pro-choice women and men for silently praying. Also, that behavior is NOT all pro-lifers, and from the rest of us, we wholeheartedly apologize for them. You are right; it is unacceptable and cruel for so called people of faith to say such awful things to other human beings. But being Christian does not mean hating, bashing, and picking on other people for their decisions.

      The bottom line is that abortion hurts women and it kills a person. I bet that if you looked into the truth of the matter more, you would feel differently. The deception here is that abortion doesn’t kill a person. It does, and the situation a person is in does not affect that it is a life growing.

      • Laura says:

        I totally agree with you. Im also one of those pro-lifers who stand outside silently and pray. I live in colorado springs, and im catholic. Because of the prayers that churches all over the city have said, the head of the planned parenthood here had a change of heart and 2 doctors as well. they have all realized that abortion is wrong, and it kills a human!

    • Jason says:

      When you go into a clinic of that nature are you not there to terminate a pregnancy which if it is not terminated leads to new life? It is not hating when I am pointing out the error in your thinking it is being corrective and hopefully guiding you down the correct path. I would not agree with throwing rocks or any way causing physical damage to another person. However many people feel strongly about this and do not always control their impulses.

      [THIS COMMENT HAS BEEN EDITED]

      • Jon says:

        Jason, I will not disagree with you killing is killing. But, as someone who cam from an abusive home with unstable parents I would have to say from personal experince that a mercy kill is better than a life of hell. That is how killing can be a merciful act.

        • Marie says:

          Jon, I hear your deep pain and am deeply troubled by your email. It sounds like you’re suffering from depression. Rather than killing yourself or people like you, who have or are suffering from depression, I hope and pray that you, and others like you, will seek loving, professional help. I promise you that there is hope, healing and recovery available for you and for people like you who’ve suffered all kinds of abuse. And I hope and pray that you find it. Death, whether suicide or homicide of the unworthy or unwanted, whether they be babies (like you believe), Jews (like Hitler believed) or blacks (like the KKK believed), is not the answer. Life, love and faith are. By what authority do people “play God” and determine who should live, and who should die? What if these same people deem your life unworthy or of low quality and choose to kill you? What’s to stop them? Why stop at unwanted preborn babies? Why not kill unwanted newborns, toddlers, children, elderly, poor, mentally or physically ill, minorities, unemployed, handicapped or disabled, as well? Many are against capitol punishment–killing of convicted criminals–and against killing of animals for sport or for their fur. How much more then must we be against the killing of a human baby–innocent human life that has harmed no one–this kind of killing is by definition intrinsically evil and is never justified or humane. Sadly, 1 out of 3 preborn children is killed by abortion, so the most dangerous place for a baby today is the place that should be the safest, in its own mother’s womb. I pray daily for an end to this holocaust. You are in my thoughts and prayers, as well, and may God bless you.

        • Adrienne says:

          @Jon: My heart goes out to you for your circumstances, and I hope you find healing.

          I wonder…if someone had met you as a small child of age 4 or 5, and they realized you were being subjected to abuse, would it be appropriate for them to kill you to spare you from the rest of your terrible upbringing? I would think you would prefer they remove you from the home and put you in a safe, loving environment with foster or adoptive parents.

          If you agree that the above scenario where a 5 year old is killed sounds horrific, it follows that freeing someone from abuse is not a good reason for killing the victim.

          The real issue here is the age of the child. I think most people would be horrified to find a 4 or 5 year old child was the subject of a “mercy kill” like you described. Yet every day many turn their backs when the same is done to an unborn baby.

          If the baby is a human being from conception (and I strongly believe that it is), killing him or her for any reason is just plain wrong. The same answer is viable here: adoption.

      • Jon says:

        Killing is “humane” in a number of situations: elective euthanasia, Do Not Resuscitate forms, going to war to kill people trying to destroy you, police killing a man wielding a gun trying to hurt children. Do you need any more examples? I suppose you think that “life” is the most important thing about living, but you do not truly value life, nor do you have any concept of what it means to actually value life. Death is not the worst thing that can happen to you, and if you don’t know that then you are obviously not as “moral” as you think.

        • Adrienne says:

          I do not believe elective euthanasia is humane. I have known people that suffered greatly at the end of their lives and the ones that wished to die via euthanasia were not those with the most pain, they were the ones that had no hope. (specifically hope for life after death)

          A DNR is not killing, but rather not interfering in a process that has already started.

          A police officer that kills a man wielding a gun trying to hurt children has chosen the most moral choice of those with which he was presented. Human beings have an obligation to protect life and a choice to do so is heroic.

          If you have another example of a killing that is “humane” I would be glad to consider it. I’m not close-minded on this issue, I just have yet to hear an example that is adequate.

          Your claims that I do not value life are baseless. I value life, my own and life in general, a great deal. Why would I be so adamant about voicing my opinion in favor of it if I didn’t? It is odd to me that someone advocating for “mercy killings” would make such accusations to someone that is pro-life.

          I know that death is not the worst thing that can happen to a person. I’m of the opinion that a natural death can be a blessing for those that believe in the mercy of the Lord.

          You aren’t the only one in this world that has been to Hell and back at the merciless hands of someone that should be your protector. I get that you are still dealing with these issues, but if you shed away the anger and hurt you are feeling for your own situation, get outside yourself, you might see things a little differently.

          If someone had been there to stand up for your life and protect you, would you feel differently? Shouldn’t we give innocent babies the same chance?

  16. SarahStickbug says:

    This show is not about making a decision. The decision was already made when the man and woman decided to have sex. Don’t get me wrong, I am by no means naive – I have had my share of sexual promiscuity. If you have sex, there’s is a high probability that you and your partner create a life. Notice, I did not say “become pregnant,” because the medical jargon has clouded our minds of what is truly happening inside. Abortion is not “terminating a pregnancy,” but killing a person. Let’s all face up to it. In the instance of the woman who cheated on her husband – the mistake was not the resulting child; the mistake was her wrongdoing. She has created this problem, and wants to cover it up. When a woman conceives, there is no “covering it up.” My cousin was born from my uncle and a woman he met at his office. After years of healing from his adultery, my uncle and aunt became the strongest couple I have ever seen. Because they dealt with his mistake, and could watch a beautiful woman grow up and live.
    This whole debate is about taking responsibility for your own actions. When are we going to grow up?

    • Jonathan says:

      You seem to have no response to either of the other two pregnancy scenarios. What if your uncle had fallen into a downward spiral and become abusive as a result of his infidelity? What if instead of stabilizing his relationship, he decided that his child was a constant reminder of his own faults and decided to beat and abuse his child. Would you still think it was such a fantastic idea that he kept the child? Why is it that people who are pro-life never stop and consider the quality of the life that may come to be. I’m not saying that any ill planned pregnancy should be terminated, I myself was raised a christian and truly dislike abortion. However, I don’t believe that just “surviving” is living. Think about the pain and suffering that could be avoided if, instead of trying to follow some obscure divine mandate, we actually thought about what kind of life we could offer children and make our decisions based on that, not on selfish self-imposed moralities.

      [THIS COMMENT HAS BEEN EDITED]

      • Kris Oren says:

        There are laws in place to protect kids and women who are being abused. Anyone aware of an abusive situation should report it to the authorities. No woman should put up with abuse or the abuse of her child. No neighbor should stand idly by and watch an abuse situation and not intervene. Is this show about abuse? Is it about how to get out of an abusive situation? There are people who can help. There is a way out. Abortion is abuse at its extreme. The answer to abuse is not more abuse. Respecting life is not “following some obsure divine mandate”. It is morality at its most basic level.

        • SarahStickbug says:

          I appreciate your reply Kris Oren, because it reminds everyone that there are laws already in place for the “post born” persons and not for the “pre born” persons. I use that language only to re-emphasize my point. Imagine if someone started calling rapists “involuntary sex partners”? What if we started calling murder “post-pregnancy termination”? I hope that sounds ludicrous to everyone.

          To Jonathan – I never said my uncle did not go down a downward spiral; his infidelity was the result of his downward spiral. I have no response to the scenarios because I believe this show is merely taking the viewers down rabbit trails in order to avert from the core issue of the personhood inside the womb. You are basically saying that every pregnancy needs to be weighed and have a success percentage stamped on their little foreheads before they are allowed to be naturally born. Who gives you that right to decide? No one lives a life of sunshine and dandelions and we all have troubling pasts. That doesn’t mean we should have never been born.

  17. Heather says:

    I think this show is necessary to open up a dialogue about pregnancy. We are so willing in this country to say that abortion is wrong, but we are so unwilling to talk about sex. If we want to “end” abortion, we need to talk about sex. This taboo we have in America about sex is increasing teenage pregnancy and the occurrence of abortion, not to mention the rise of STDs. Obviously, people are having sex, pre-marital and otherwise. Children are having sex. But, we only want to talk about it once their decision to have sex has already been made and they are pregnant. We need to educate our children about the choice to have sex or not to have sex. And, if they decide that they want to have sex, they need to know how to protect themselves. We need to understand that not everyone shares the same religious viewpoints, and as such, should have the opportunity to be educated about safe sex practices. We need to stop being so naive to think that solely teaching abstinence to our children actually works. It is hard, when your hormones are raging, to think rationally and to not have sex. So, when kids are faced with these situations, they do not know how to protect themselves. By educating children about safe sex practices, while stressing the consequences of sex, we can prevent unplanned pregnancies and abortions. More children will be born to families that can welcome them wholeheartedly into their home, rather than having to make the heart-wrenching decision to abort the pregnancy because they cannot take care of the child.

    So, for those of you who believe that abortion is wrong, we need to talk to our kids before that can become an option. We need to be preventative, not reactionary. We need to save our children heartache from feeling like they have to end a potential life.

    • Jonathan says:

      I could not agree with you more.

    • Eric says:

      Agreed.

      Can we stop the abstinence only education already?

      We’ve been preaching that gospel unsuccessfully for how many decades. As a nation we need to ‘grow up’ and realize sex is real, people do it, kids do it and it’s healthy, normal and expected. Frank conversations about sex are perhaps the best way to reduce unwanted pregnancy.

      • Florentius says:

        Eric,

        I would argue that “frank conversations about sex” are the worst way to reduce unwanted pregnancies. As a young teen back in the 1980s, we had “frank conversations about sex” in our Catholic sex-ed classes–over and over and over again, often led by nuns. But if you think that made people more responsible about sex, you couldn’t be more wrong. It just encouraged experimentation at a very early age. And that is exactly the kind of behavior that leads to more unplanned pregnancies, not less.

        Sex education in schools is a complete and total failure. To be honest, our experience with it when we were kids is one of the main reasons my wife and I are homeschooling our five children. I don’t want them to have to go through the same destructive sexual socialization program that we did. My parents, God bless them, were ignorant of what was going on in the schools. We are not.

        If you really want to reduce “unwanted” pregnancies, the way to do it is obvious–raise boys to be gentlemen who treat women with respect, not like pieces of meat. And raise girls to be women view their fertility as the tremendous gift and blessing that it is.

      • Beth says:

        Eric,
        I’m a 21 year old female college student. My siblings and I were recieved abstinence only education in school and in the home. Though we are not all yet married, we are all safe-keeping our virginity as a gift to those who, God willing, will be our life companions. This is not an idea that was pounded into our resisting minds. It was explained to us accurately and simply. We do not hold to it to make others happy (trust me we are familiar enough with being rebelious teens etc.), but because we are logical people with control over our own actions. We are not animals, reduced to mindlessly obeying our nervous system as today’s more common version of “sex education” would have us believe. We might be “kids” but that doesn’t mean we lack the maturity or logic to understand that sex is only “healthy, normal and expected” at a time when it is also “healthy, normal and expected” that we have children. That is the only frank piece of information that the majority of today’s “sex education” is missing. The culture and media and even often educators lie to us about sex. All the conditions given for having sex (consenting couple, emotional maturity, clean sexual bill of health, etc.) have no relation to the conditions for having children (permanent relationship, sufficient income, general desire to raise children, etc.). Abstinence only education is the only sex education that sets us free from these lies. It is the only education that teaches us that we have control of ourselves, our actions, and ultimately our destinies.
        There is nothing wrong, broken, or false about abstinence only education. There are misunderstandings and misconceptions about practicing abstinence that make it seem like a bad thing, but there are many more misunderstandings and misconceptions created by traditional sex education and the culture that make it seem like a “healthy, normal and expected” thing.
        This generation has been handicapped by “frank conversations about sex”. We need to be encouraged and believed in and supported in our efforts break the status quo, not patted on the head and sent down the path of least resistance with a handful of condoms. We don’t need to be enabled and accomodated. We need to be genuinely cared about.

        • Carpe Diem says:

          Beth,

          Thank you so much for this very helpful post. I think you very adequately made the case for approaching sex education with our kids from the stand point of setting the bar higher (if you will) for them. I think it is a travesty today when we see the older generation just throwing the kids into the lion’s den by underestimating their abilities. I love how you said, “This is not an idea that was pounded into our resisting minds. It was explained to us accurately and simply.”

          I also want to draw out another point you made, “ We do not hold to it to make others happy (trust me we are familiar enough with being rebellious teens etc.), but because we are logical people with control over our own actions. We are not animals, reduced to mindlessly obeying our nervous system as today’s more common version of “sex education” would have us believe.“

          That was worth repeating!

          If sex didn’t also carry with it the the prospect of creating a child, then it might be okay to approach it only mentioning the conditions that you noted (consenting couple, emotional maturity, clean sexual bill of health) as pre-requisites to entering into a sexual relationship, but it doesn’t. As we all know, sex can create new life and the fact that we have an escape route called abortion makes it easier to sweep that whole discussion ”under the rug“, if you will. We aren’t teaching responsibility to our kids when we don’t also discuss the ideal conditions that can and should be met before we have children.

          I love that you make a point to say, “We might be “kids” but that doesn’t mean we lack the maturity or logic to understand that sex is only “healthy, normal and expected” at a time when it is also “healthy, normal and expected” that we have children.“ It is such a great reminder to all the adults who think this is impossible to teach kids.

          You are so wise beyond your years and I believe a true leader for your generation. We adults have much to learn from you. And I believe the take away message is actually a question that we as a society must answer…… do we genuinely care about you? If, indeed, we do, then we must begin to treat you with the respect and dignity you so deserve, which starts with the assumption that you are completely able to control of yourselves, your actions, and ultimately your destinies. I, for one, am so sorry that we have let you down and sold you short by setting the bar too low for you as a generation.